Confidence is Calmness

Unraveling the True Essence of Quiet Strength

Setting the Scene

Hey folks, grab a cup of your favorite brew and settle in. I've got a story that’s been on my mind—a compelling tale of two "tough guys" and a lesson in what confidence isn't. Think of two men, chests puffed out, screaming at the top of their lungs, on the brink of a throwdown. The display was less like a showdown of titans and more like toddlers squabbling over a toy. It got me pondering, is this really what confidence looks like? Spoiler alert: it's not.

The Facade of False Confidence

First things first, let's talk about the widespread confusion between arrogance or aggression and genuine confidence. Society often celebrates these boisterous displays as if shouting louder makes you more credible. It’s as ridiculous as saying adding sugar to espresso makes it better coffee. No, it doesn’t, folks.

Identity and Insecurity

When we’re shaky on who we are or what we’re about, the temptation to play-act confidence can be overpowering. Take it from someone who's been there. Early days as a pastor? Terrified of public speaking. Getting into the coffee biz? Not exactly Mr. Espresso. I played roles to cover up my insecurities, assuming authority and expertise I didn't yet possess.

The Masks We Choose

Diving deeper, why do we pick these particular disguises? For me, the "authority" mask felt like the quickest shortcut to credibility in my pastoral role. Yet, shortcuts often lead you down rocky paths, and mine was no exception. It compromised my authenticity.

The Transparency of Pretense

Here’s where the plot thickens: Most people have a sixth sense for spotting phoniness. It's like when someone's overcompensating in disc golf; you can tell they’re not as good as they claim to be. And let's not forget the amplifier of fake confidence: social media. We all curate, but authenticity wins the day.

True Confidence

So what's the real deal? Authentic confidence doesn't make a scene; it doesn't need a stage. It's calmly knowing your worth and feeling secure in that knowledge. As I've matured in my roles—from pastoral work to brewing coffee—I've realized that there's no need to put on a show. Being true to who I am resonates more than any act.

Practical Steps to Cultivating Calm Confidence

Want actionable tips? Start by facing your insecurities. For me, that meant practicing public speaking and really learning my beans when it came to coffee. And if you need a mantra to keep you centered, here’s one: “I am enough, just as I am.”

The Last Sip

Alright, let’s tie this up. If you ever find yourself puffing up, acting bigger or louder than you actually feel, take a moment. A pause can be enlightening. Ask yourself, is this authentic confidence or am I merely putting on a show? Strive for the kind of quiet strength that comes from within, needing no external validation.

Until next time, let your authentic self shine. Keep it grounded, just like a good cup of coffee should be.

Cheers! 🍵👋