What if I had chosen differently?
What if that door had opened?
What if I hadn’t lost what I lost?
It’s a tempting loop. But focusing on what could have been is just an obstacle to what actually is.
the weight of looking back
Past pains are real. No denying it. Struggles leave scars, and some never quite fade. History, when we let it, can be an incredible teacher. But often, instead of learning, we live with the wound wide open. Instead of carrying wisdom forward, we keep circling the hurt, hoping it will rewrite itself.
And it’s not always negative. Sometimes it’s the good old days that distract us. We replay moments when things felt simpler, lighter, more alive. And without realizing it, we start wishing we were there instead of here.
the only ground we stand on
Here’s the problem: you can’t edit yesterday.
You can’t dictate tomorrow.
The only ground we ever actually stand on is today.
That means regret can’t undo the past. Nostalgia can’t resurrect it. And worry can’t guarantee a future. All we really have the ability to impact is right now.
a small invitation
So maybe the shift isn’t about forgetting the past or ignoring the future—it’s about refusing to let them steal the weight of the present moment.
Don’t let life be so clouded by what was that you forget to live in what is.
The question isn’t “what could have been?”
It’s “what can I do, right now, with what I have?”
And maybe that simple reframe is enough to unclog the gears, to help us move forward with less drag and a little more freedom.